I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
