things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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