i don't plan on having that self control this summer
and she was petting her beer can
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
