the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
