i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
