No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
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