it was like his penis was on wheels.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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