It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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