you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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