is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
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I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
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