so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
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