She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Randomize
