what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
