i don't like sucking hair
Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Randomize
