We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
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