OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
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