i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
