Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
