I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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