This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Randomize
