I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Randomize
