That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
Randomize
