I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
