My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Randomize
