You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
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