Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
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