why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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