her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
