Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
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