I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Randomize
