i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives�
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Randomize
