spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
