this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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