Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
operation have a gay friend backfired
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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