I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize
