I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
