The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
Randomize
