Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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