a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
Randomize
