question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
