we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
