Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
