his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
