so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Randomize
