So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
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