She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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