i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
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