Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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