There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Randomize
