New low: just hacked my moms facebook
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
